Regret, by definition, is sadness associated with an error or disappointment. It's a process in which we spin out the various alternate endings a situation we could've had. Meaning to say, we keep busting out the "What If". What if I I'd done the work earlier? What if I apologized to her? What if I hadn't ordered the prawns? And who do you think would love to answer all your What Ifs? The things already happened and we could do nothing to turn back the time and change everything.
At best, regret is a constructive tool taht gives us a sting when we've messed up, ensuring that we learn our lesson and don't repeat the same mistakes. At worst, regret becomes an endless, torturous game of "what if". Everyone has regrets. But does everyone dwell on them 100 percent of the time? No. That's where resilience comes in. Some people are naturally strong minded and bounce back from anything, and some people need help to learn how to do that.
So how to deal with regret(s)?
- Write down your regrets, this will clarifies them in your mind.
- Examine them, understand the reasons behind your decisions.
- Change your toxic thought patterns, reinforce the good thoughts rather than focusing on the bad ones.
- Make amends, apologise for something you've done.
- Develop compassion, understand other people points of view and emphatize.
- Grieve losses that you have suffered. Acknowledge that you feel angry or sad about the situation.
